A commoner's unsolicited advice to Prince Harry and Meghan Markle

Heidi Ng

IT SEEMS like my last article got quite a number of reactions and I feel the need to follow up on my article. That is not meant to put down the Sussexes but rather a view on why I think people are not happy with them. Those are my observations watching first hand their engagement interview, and the recent Africa documentary in which she was teary-eyed and was sullen and totally looked beaten.

If I am part of her very expensive public relations team Sunshine Sachs, I might suggest the following to the couple:

1. I would ask them to know what they want. Do they want privacy? Or do they want media attention? It cannot go both ways. It is either you want people to talk about you or forget about you entirely. This has been a confusion in their actions. When they gave birth to Archie Mountbatten-Windsor, they wanted privacy. How can you be private when Archie is 7th in line to the throne? Of course, the public wants to know. They accuse the press of being mean to them and yet does not praise the press for covering their numerous engagements like their world tour in Australia and New Zealand, and their African tours. I think what they want to happen is to only have the media talk positively about them. No negative publicity allowed. First off, that is not realistic. Secondly, they have to change their actions so the media can genuinely see their sincerity in helping out.

If you call for climate change and even say you will only have maximum two kids to save the Earth yet take four private jet trips within two weeks that is not even work-related, people will call you out. They took private jets not to fly off to some war-torn country but to holiday in the South of France and Ibiza, Spain. This is what happened and the two cried that the media is vilifying them. The media calls out hypocritical actions and that did not sit well with them.

2. I would suggest to Meghan that she forget her former actress gig. When she is giving interviews, she is not an actress anymore, but a humanitarian wife of a British prince. I would remind her that she is part of a duo now who wants to do good. I would tell her to stop playing the victim on interviews. Her disaster documentary wherein she said "not many have asked if I'm okay." I mean she has a loving husband, a great baby, royalists who love the Royal family, A-lister friends, money and influence at her disposal to actually make a difference in the world then you play the victim and say this. Her marriage to Prince Harry opened doors for her to meet Disney, and other influential people.

She has food, she has a 16 room “cottage,” all flights, clothes, allowances taken care of. She has seen the poorest of the poor so she has to stop complaining not many have asked if she’s okay. Of course, she’s okay! Others are dying from poverty and malnutrition, fleeing from wars, and here she is tearily complaining of such. I would gently remind her that It’s not all about her.

3. Also, charity begins at home. If she wants to be seen as a true humanitarian, make amends with your dad. She has flown all over but she did not even visit her dad after her dad's surgery. She should be able to forgive her dad after the tabloid fiasco, introduce him to his grandchild and to Harry properly. I mean the dad has not even met the guy even while they were still in talking terms.

4. I would also make amends with the Queen. I still think they should have told grandma first. I mean if I was going to resign from my job, I would not announce it prior to telling my immediate supervisor I am quitting my job. That is just kind of disrespectful. Honestly though? I think they should have also waited. The Queen is old, Prince Philip is sick. It seems they are in such a hurry to carve their own path without regard for their family members, not as the Institution but as family members.

5. They mentioned they want to be financially independent. If that is the case, they should pay for their own security. There is a debate now in Canada on who is paying for their security. I think taxpayers should not be on the hook for this. They should make a press release just like what they did with their website to say that none of their expenses are being paid by anybody else except them.

6. Since they are no longer working for the family business, I think they should also forego the allowances from the Duchy of Cornwall since that duchy is by virtue of Prince Charles being the heir to the throne.

5. Lastly, I think they should make peace with Prince William and Duchess Kate. After all, there is just the two of them. They can go back to being the Fab Four. I would tell them to reassess their roles. Prince William is the heir after Charles, Kate will be queen. The sooner they accept that, the better their relationship will be. There should be no overlapping of roles, or of expectations. Also, as the newest family member, I would suggest to Meghan to humble herself. Much like if you are the new daughter in law in a common family, you would adjust to that family. You should not expect the family to adjust to you. If you love your husband, you have to learn to accept the whole family and their traditions and culture. There are some daughter in-laws who even instigate clashes within the family they are entering. They try to insert themselves in all family decisions whether in the family business or in family matters. That is not your place. If you are entering a family, make peace with that family, humble yourself, be respectful at all times, do not separate your husband or wife from the rest of his family. They came first before you. Manage the new situation with utmost care, respect, and a dose of selflessness. Remember, it is not just all about you.

Follow me on Twitter @Missheiding, Instagram @missheiding and website www.sunstar.com.ph.