Dad describes coming out to his kids as non-binary after they saw him wearing a dress

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·Contributor, Yahoo Life UK
·4 min read
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Dave Moore decided to come out to his children as non-binary after they saw photos of him wearing a dress. (SWNS)
Dave Moore decided to come out to his children as non-binary after they saw photos of him wearing a dress. (SWNS)

A father-of-two has described the moment he came out as non-binary to his children after they saw pictures of him wearing a dress and didn't recognise him.

Dave Moore, 40, from Cardiff decided to reveal the truth he'd kept hidden for 35 years after attending the Bristol Pride parade on Saturday.

Moore, who is heterosexual, sometimes dresses in feminine clothing and identifies as non-binary, using the pronouns he/him.

The IT consultant admits spending the majority of his life in "horrific" pain whilst "hiding" his true gender identity.

His children – a five-year-old son and an eight-year-old daughter – were aware that him and his female partner Alex Andersz, 35, were attending the Pride event last weekend, but Moore did not originally plan on telling them about his gender identity.

His partner Alex identifies as cisgender and is pansexual.

Read More: How to support someone when they come out

Moore, 40, decided to reveal his gender identity after attending the Bristol Pride parade on Saturday, pictured with his female partner Alex Andersz. (SWNS)
Moore, 40, decided to reveal his gender identity after attending the Bristol Pride parade on Saturday, pictured with his female partner Alex Andersz. (SWNS)

Following the Pride parade, his children saw pictures of him in a dress and didn't realise it was their dad, which prompted Moore to explain to them that he is non-binary.

"They wanted to know how the Pride parade was and Alex asked if they wanted to see her make-up and started showing them photos of the make-up she did for Pride," he explains.

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"She was skipping through the photos on a phone and there were photos of me there in my outfit, which was a dress.

"My daughter was looking at them but she didn't twig at all."

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Dave Moore and his female partner Alex Andersz at Bristol Pride 2022. (SWNS)
Dave Moore and his female partner Alex Andersz at Bristol Pride 2022. (SWNS)

Later that day, Moore decided to open up to his children, showing them the photos of himself again and explaining that it was him in the dress.

"My daughter just kind of giggled, and said, 'Oh my God, you look like a girl!'," he says on her initial reaction.

"We talked a bit about what non-binary meant and how I didn't quite feel 100% like a man all the time.

"The best bit about it for me was when I was about to put them to bed I asked whether they wanted a bedtime story or if they wanted to see more photos of me, and they both wanted to see more photos.

"They responded really well," he continues.

"My daughter wanted to shout it from the rooftops. She wanted to go and tell her friends in school."

Read more: LGBTQ+ parenting: ‘It was a rocky road to becoming a dad, but I’m loving it’

Moore was previously conflicted about telling his children about being non-binary. (SWNS)
Moore was previously conflicted about telling his children about being non-binary. (SWNS)

Moore met Andersz in 2019, after getting chatting on a night out in Manchester, and was open about his identity from the start.

“One of the first things I did was show her a picture of me dressed up and she was just like, ‘Wow, that's amazing,'" he explains.

“We had a really nice night together and got together as a couple after that.

“We’re boyfriend and girlfriend, man and woman like everybody else, but we're best friends as well.

"We share all our clothes and are both a size 10-12.

“Alex buys a dress and is like, 'I reckon this will look really good on you, it's perfect.'

"My wardrobe is like 50-60% female clothes and shoes.”

While his partner has always known about his gender identity, Moore was previously torn about how to express it to his family.

"I debated whether this was something I could completely hide from them, whether we kind of gently introduced them to it, or whether I just dressed like that in front of them from an early, age so that they're completely normalised to it," he says.

"And, you know I could never really come to a conclusion.

"However, I don't regret not doing it earlier, I think it was probably the right time to do it."

Read more: Jennifer Lopez praised for introducing her child using they/them pronouns

Dave Moore and his partner Alex Andersz. (SWNS)
Dave Moore and his partner Alex Andersz. (SWNS)

Moore adds that he plans to continue to speak openly with his children and wants to attend future Pride events with them.

"I want to set an example for my children, I want to be a positive non-binary role model for them."

For information and support visit the charity, Beaumont Society.

Additional reporting SWNS.

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