Heart Evangelista talks about her miscarriage in her previous Instagram story. Read about it here.
What can you read in this article?
Heart Evangelista recalls her miscarriage, “Worst day of my life.”
Traumatized by having a miscarriage, does she want to try again?
What not say to women who had a miscarriage
We often look up to celebrities because they always present themselves in a stylish way. But sometimes we forget that behind the glitz and glamour, they are also human beings with feelings. And like us, some of them are also mothers.
While she may look totally fine and fabulous (as always) on the outside, Heart Evangelista showed her followers that she still thinks about the day she lost her babies.
Heart Evangelista’s miscarriage in 2018
In her previous Instagram story, the high-profile actress recalled the day she found out about her miscarriage. Yesterday, she shared a throwback photo showing her inside a hospital room with her husband, Sorsogon Governor Francis “Chiz” Escudero. She described that day as the worst day of her life.
“Worst day of my life. Lost my twins.. Now I have angels :-),” she wrote.
Screenshot from Heart Evangelista’s Instagram account
It was in May 2018 when Heart first announced that she and Chiz were expecting twins. However, about a month later, she shared the news that she had a miscarriage and lost both babies.
In a previous post, the actress revealed that she was traumatized by her miscarriage. She shared having feelings of longing for her babies and thinking that she was not a good person that’s why she had to suffer.
“Having a miscarriage is the most traumatizing feeling. I carried my twins 4 months after because my doctor wanted me to naturally go through the process.
It was the most horrible feeling thinking maybe God can bring them back to me … or me thinking am I not a good person for this to happen.
Having babies is for sure a blessing or just actually being able to feel that you can love someone even if you haven’t met them. I had a stroller, a baby room and a name. My babies already had a life prepared for them,” she said.
In her Instagram highlights labeled “Mommyhood,” where the actress documented her pregnancy journey, the last entry was a photo of a woman with the words “I carry you in my heart.”
Traumatized but not defeated
Heart shared that she feels blessed enough, but is not closing her doors to when she would welcome a baby in her life. Like a true queen, she said this while also clapping back at a netizen who commented that she “badly needs” to have a baby.
“Now me trying after a year or so is my choice but me not having a baby as of the moment is God’s choice and I wouldn’t want to question that,” she added.
“I’m too blessed my love. Too shy to ask more from God. If He gives me one—a big thank you. Whatever it is dear, thank you for your concern, but this bitter-sweet comment of yours is inappropriate,” she said.
Last November, Heart revealed in her vlog that after the pandemic, she and Chiz are going to try another option and see if they could conceive again.
“Malapit na. After the pandemic, mag-option C na ako. Nag-B na ako eh, so C na tayo. Wait lang kayo diyan. Mag-option C na ako after the pandemic. Bigyan lang natin ito ng chance,” she said.
Image taken from Heart Evangelista’s Instagram account
What not to say to someone who had a miscarriage
About 1 in 10 pregnancies end up in a miscarriage (a very sad statistic), so you probably know someone in your life who has lost her baby. While all you really want is to console that person and give a little bit of hope, some words really come across as insensitive, especially for a woman who just lost her child.
You may think you’re just helping her feel better, what you say might actually yield an opposite result. To avoid sad and awkward situations like that, here are some things you should NOT say to someone who had a miscarriage:
“It happened for a reason.”
“It wasn’t meant to be.”
“Just focus on everything you have.”
“At least you didn’t know your baby.”
“You can always have another.”
So, what can you say to that person instead?
First off, don’t say “I understand how you feel” when you have not gone through this painful process. Instead, you can just console by saying “I’m sorry for your loss.” And before making the person to go into the difficult details, always ask if she wants to talk about it. If not, give her an opportunity to exit the conversation.
Remember, it’s not their job to make you feel good about yourself. It’s them who need comfort and reassurance. So you can just end with, “I’m here for you.” And if you’re not sure if what you’ll say will sound offensive, it’s always best to not say anything at all.