Jana Kramer reflects on trauma, abusive relationships: 'I betrayed myself'

·3 min read

Jana Kramer is getting candid about her feelings of self-worth while speaking her truth about abusive relationships and negative self-talk.

"The voices in my head….I’ve been mentally physically and emotionally abused in past relationships. I allowed certain behaviors to continue on because I actually believed the negative voices in my head that were spoken to me," Kramer wrote alongside a photo of her holding a sign that reads, "I'm broken & I'm not enough."

The 37-year-old actress and singer has spoken publicly about her struggles amid her divorce from former NFL player Mike Caussin, sharing in numerous social media posts about how she's been working on moving forward with the two children she shares with her ex. On Monday, she opened up about more reasons on why the journey has been so rough, as she opened up about the toll that past abuse has taken on her.

"All the words, and abuse equaled, I'm not enough. And I'm not worthy of love," she continued. "For years I've repeated patterns, fallen into the trap of believing those voices, hurting myself and hurting others because of my desire to be chosen, to be enough. And I've fallen for the same abuse in a relationship because it’s what I thought I deserved."

Kramer spoke further about her trauma in an episode of her podcast Whine Down with Jana Kramer with guest Mel Robbins where Kramer talked about the impact that it had on her relationship with Caussin. She even admitted that she stayed in the relationship longer than she believes she should have.

"If I'm really truly being honest, I always knew he would cheat. I just never wanted to believe that. But seeing the repeated patterns…knowing now what I know was actually going on then, I knew. There was that piece of me that knew," she said of Caussin's infidelity, which she's spoken publicly about before. "I've always picked the abuser. So there was something that happened when we first started dating that I don’t think I’ll actually ever share. And in that moment, I was like, it was that sign like I have to leave this. ...That was the moment that I betrayed myself because I didn’t want to see his reaction or know what his reaction would be so I allowed it to happen for the rest of our marriage."

Yahoo Life was unable to reach Caussin for comment. 

Kramer and Caussin cited "inappropriate marital conduct, irreconcilable differences and adultery" in the April 2021 divorce filing, which was finalized in July. However, the two had spoken about Caussin's cheating long before that, sharing that he was seeking treatment for sex addiction. When it came to the couple's divorce, Kramer told Extra, "it was bad enough that I had no choice."

Although Kramer hadn't made abuse accusations against Caussin, she revealed a history of abuse with her first husband Michael Gambino while she was a contestant on Dancing With the Stars. With her latest Instagram post and podcast, Kramer made it clear that she's committed to working through the trauma.

"I have not listened to my gut for so many years in my life and that’s just been the biggest betrayal. It’s obviously working through some trauma pieces in childhood and early relationships with like EMDR with my therapist and it’s been really good," she said in her podcast. "Finding that worthiness that I am ok, I don’t need validation from a man, that I’m ok alone — all of those things have been a true blessing that has come out of the divorce. And I’m still working on it, I still have moments of self-doubt and the voices and all those things."

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