The 24-year-old model and sister to supermodel Kate Moss appeared on the Call Her Daddy podcast on Wednesday where she opened up about growing up with a famous half-sister and navigating her way in the modeling industry. Lottie declared that she was "very unhappy" and "never felt like I belonged," although she booked gigs from a young age. She also experienced a lot of pressure to change who she was for the sake of the job.
"I was super insecure. I was a young kid going into modeling at like 13, 14 years old and I mean, I was told by people in the industry that I had to lose weight to do modeling. And there was one point where I had to do New York Fashion Week and they told me I had to get down to a 23-inch waist. I think I was like a 34 hips or 32 hips and they’re like you have to get down to that," she explained. "I was 18. I worked out until I got down to that size, I ate one piece of toast a day. And then lo and behold, I got there and I wasn’t tall enough. And this is the thing, for me it was more my height that I was really insecure about."
While Lottie said that she struggled as a result of these early experiences, she admitted, "I'm surprised I never got an eating disorder from modeling." Her exposure to drugs and alcohol, however, were closely tied to her work.
"It was just a part of the industry, it was very much accepted. I was also like given it in a lot of scenarios with people in the industry," she said. "A lot of the time I would show up to set and I would not be happy and I didn’t want to do it. I’d be crying my eyes out and they’d be like, 'Well we’ll just get you some drugs and you can have a drink and then you’ll be fine.' It was very much like that, like you’ll do this shoot whether you’re sober or not, it’s gonna happen to you."
Lottie explained that drugs became a part of her "coping mechanism" and allowed her to "feel numb" while she was otherwise dealing with feelings of self-doubt.
"I never felt good enough and I still struggle to this day with feeling good enough because I mean everywhere I go I’m never going to not be Kate Moss’s sister," Lottie said. "Everywhere I go everyone knows who she is, everyone has pictures of her in their house."
Ultimately, the state of her mental health and her reliance on substances led her to seek treatment in Feb. of this year.
"I was very depressed, I was very unhappy, I couldn’t get out of bed in the morning and it got to a point where I just thought, I can’t do this anymore. I don’t want to be like this, I don’t want to not be able to get out of bed in the morning. I want to be happy and I deserve to be happy," she recalled. "But I was surrounding myself with a lot of negative people, which is what happens when you’re taking drugs and when you’re unhappy, drugs happen more. It just spiraled out of control."
Since getting out of rehab and being in recovery, Lottie decided to leave parts of her old life behind, including her former modeling agency that she felt was "holding me back." She even started a new venture on OnlyFans.
Lottie said she first heard of the subscription-based platform through a friend who had been posting photos to the site while they were roommates. "I just saw her shoot one day and I was like, this is what I want to do. This looks so fun," she said.
"I probably should’ve given a little more of a f***," she said of shooting her own risqué content for the site, "but you know what, I’ve been so afraid to be who I am for such a long time, I’m just gonna do it. I was like, this is fun to me and this is what I enjoy so I’m just gonna do it. I encourage any woman who’s like proud of their body and would like to do it, should do it."
Since creating her OnlyFans page, Lottie said she's had an "awkward conversation" about it with her family members, ensuring that she's being safe on the platform.
"Obviously it was hard. Me and my mom didn’t speak for a couple of weeks but then she got over it and we have a great relationship now so that’s good," she said. As for her sister Kate, "she said the same. She was like I’m super proud of you, like whatever you do. I think she was also kind of happy that I’m not doing exactly what she’s doing."
And while Lottie is happy to post nude content or in her underwear, she said that she draws the line at sex. "I'm not gonna have sex on there. That's the one thing."
Discussing sexuality, however, isn't off limits for Lottie, who previously came out as pansexual. "It doesn’t matter what gender, what sexual identity they are. I just love people," she clarified on the podcast.
"It’s all sexual liberation, genuinely, for me," she shared. "I feel most liberated when I’m naked, I feel huge power in just being very happy, being sexual."
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